By Robert Pringles | Rockport Correspondent
ROCKPORT — What begins as a charming stroll through the granite legacy of Cape Ann has, according to growing numbers of visitors, turned into an unrelenting avalanche of geology-based puns, courtesy of the enthusiastic rangers leading the “When Granite Was King!” tours at Halibut Point State Park.
Held every Saturday from June through September, the 10 a.m. walking tour promises guests a deep dive into Babson Farm Quarry’s role in building the bridges, breakwaters, and boulevards of a young America. But for many, it’s the wordplay — not the history — that’s been rocking their world.
“The ranger met us at the park entrance and immediately said, ‘We’re going to have a gneiss time,’” said Rockport resident Fredrick Ortmon. “And I thought, okay, sure. But then it was non-stop. By the end, I felt emotionally eroded. Oh god, now I’m doing it!”
At the end of one tour, the ranger on duty pointed to the quarry pit and solemnly declared, “That’s the hole story.” One attendee was heard remarking, “That’s not even a rock pun.”
“I came for some local history facts,” said Susan Marstrand of Ipswich. “What I got was a man in a campaign hat throwing out stone puns like he had bought them on shale.”
Despite complaints, staff at the Department of Conservation and Recreation say punning falls under “interpretive embellishment,” and no regulations or policies have been violated. “We want our rangers to engage the public,” said one spokesperson. “Though sometimes they do get a little sedimental about the topics.”
Rangers reportedly remain unfazed. One, when confronted by a displeased tourist, allegedly replied, “Tough schist.”
The Saturday morning tours continue weekly through September 21. Visitors are encouraged to not take anything for granite, bring water, wear sturdy shoes, and emotionally brace for some truly seismic levels of dad jokes.
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