By Robert Pringles | Rockport Correspondent
ROCKPORT — A well-intentioned Pride Month proclamation has sparked unexpected activity along Bearskin Neck this week, after town officials declared the historic street a “sanctuary for bears of all kinds.”
The announcement, issued Monday by the Rockport Select Board, was intended to recognize and support the LGBTQ+ community, specifically self-identified “bears” — burly, often bearded gay men who embrace the label with pride and body hair. Unfortunately, the town’s declaration lacked certain clarifying adjectives.
By Wednesday, at least two dozen gay men with enviable beards clad in tank tops, cutoffs, and flannel had begun to appear along the Neck, taking selfies and wandering in and out of various shops. Simultaneously, Rockport Police received three separate calls about what one resident described as “a family of absolutely non-metaphorical bears” fishing off of the Rockport Breakwater.
“I thought it was just going to be a tourism thing but with rainbow flags,” said Jonathan LaPine of Medford. “Then the real bears showed up and honestly? I felt seen. But also slightly endangered.”
Witnesses reported the bears arrived via an Uber, the driver of which thought the animals were “just really detail-oriented furries.” They reportedly scratched their backs on the telephone pole outside Roy Moore’s Fish Shack and took a selfie at Motif #1 before proceeding to their fishing spot.
Junior Deputy Rockport Animal Control Officer Aurora Gold confirmed that the bear family was “likely just confused, very chill, and possibly allies.”
When asked to comment, a representative of the visiting bear population — translated via AI-assisted growl parsing — offered the following:
“We really appreciated the welcoming announcement from the town. We didn’t come for trouble. We came for the vibes and easily accessible seafood. But we are all for body positivity and inclusive communities.”
The town has since issued a clarifying statement that the sanctuary designation was symbolic, aimed at inclusivity and celebration, and “not an invitation for woodland mammals to attend Drag Night at the Shalin Liu.”
Nonetheless, both bear communities have expressed interest in some form of joint celebration. Plans are rumored for a new event tentatively titled “Bearskin Bear Weekend,” featuring lumberjack fashion contests, paw-print finger painting, and honey-tasting booths.
“This town really knows how to mix up its metaphors,” said LaPine, holding a souvenir rainbow lobster. “And I love that for all of us.”
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